For February, I am posting about love/sex-related topics. I’m also celebrating that I am posting at least one of my two posts before the end of the month. Yay!
The title of my blog entry has been a motto that I have adopted some time ago when my best friend turned me down. It has been one that I have heard from others before, but I did not want to accept it until now, nor did I truly understand the value of the phrase until more recently in my life. Let’s break down the phrase.
Friends are those who add value to my life. I also want to add value to their life. They require active maintenance and care. One of my friends likened friends to a garden. Keeping up a garden takes work, and that is a value trait that is necessary in friendship. It’s one that should also be reciprocated, in my opinion.
…Greater Than Fucking
I say this to mean that I will not compromise a friendship for the sake of a hookup or sex. It does not mean that sex is less important to me than friendship. Sex is a very healthy and important part of life for me, and I think that we all should have as much of it as possible for the benefit of our health and well-being (in a consensual, risk-aware/tolerant environment). Given the opportunity to have relations with a friend, I will consider the risk that things could “get weird” or that a friendship could be compromised after going down that road. If the risk is too great, I won’t take the risk. It is far more important to me that I cherish a friendship over a fuck, because friends are harder to find than fucks.
Friendship starts with the self and loving yourself. As Mama Ru said…if you can’t love yourself, how the hell are you gonna love anyone else?